I was at Party City the other day, picking up a few odds and ends for my NON-SKANKY costume (you will see, oh yes, you will see) and was scared out of my mind.
It was bad enough the store was playing "Thriller" over the loudspeaker - for some reason, that song totally freaks me out. And, to be honest, those motion-activated figures scare the crap out of me. There was this weird head bent over a candy bowl, and when I walked by it snapped to attention and taunted me in a cackling voice. I jumped at least three feet in the air, fo real. I could've slam-dunked if I had a basketball in my hand. And a goal in front of me. Ok, that was a bad analogy.
Then I turned the corner next to the wig aisle (appropriate) and came face-to-face with a life-sized mannequin dressed as Michael Jackson.
Later I had to backtrack to get a wig cap and a little kid cut in front of me. When she passed the mannequin, she started trembling and making those terrified-kid noises. I wanted to lean down and pat her on the back and reassure her that everything is ok, he's dead now, and besides, he only liked little boys. But then how creepy would I be?!
I don't think it's disrespectful to dress as a dead celebrity, especially Jacko, but...WHY? I remember everyone dressing as the Crocodile Hunter stabbed by a sting ray after Steve Irwin died - at least that's kind of witty. But Michael Jackson? That's a really fucking creepy costume! You want to dress up as a child molester on a kids' holiday?
Maybe I'm blowing it out of proportion. Maybe it's for Michael Jackson fans, not 40 year old creepsters. If that's the case, who am I to judge? I dressed as Joe Perry one year in high school...
And, in case you missed it, go watch Community's Halloween episode.
"That's one of my biggest fears... If I ever like, woke up as a donut..."
"You would eat yourself?"
"I wouldn't even question it."
"Mm, that'd be tasty."